Teach Yourself to Smile

 

 A Christian Comedian Learns to Smile

     As a Christian comedian who enjoys studying human nature, I am firmly convinced that there are two types of people who wander the earth - (1) natural gifted smilers who willingly and effortlessly smile throughout the day and (2) those who don't.   The gifted smilers are the people to whom you are immediately attracted because a big smile is a sign of acceptance. Gifted smilers tend to make friends easily.  They’re most often outgoing and fun extroverts.   Those who are not natural smilers feel like they are smiling, but guess what – they’re not!

     I was not a gifted smiler and my husband, Bert, made it very clear I had to make the effort to learn to smile if I wanted to be a successful performer and an approachable female Christian comedian.  

     Smiling and happiness do not go hand-in-hand. I know many very happy people who don't show their internal happiness through facial expression.  I recognize these people because for twenty-five years, I was one of them. Happy on the inside, I had no idea it wasn’t reaching all the way up to my face.  I really thought I was smiling and I was shocked to find out that I wasn’t.

      My husband, who is also in the comedy business, insisted I teach myself to smile. I began forcibly making myself smile on stage and in the company of friends. It was a major and constant initial effort.  It felt completely unnatural and insincere because I was always thinking about forcing a smile and it seemed contrived.  I felt I was putting on an act and not truly being myself. However, I quickly realized the irony!   If I feel happy on the inside, a smile on my face is actually a truer reflection of my spirit.  It was time to catch up to the gifted smilers and to discover what it felt like to portray true happiness.  The effect was instantaneous!

     I immediately found putting a smile on my face changed my interaction with friends, family, acquaintances and even my Christian comedy audiences!  As I learned to smile my confidence grew in both my personal life and on stage.  People more willingly approached me and I experienced a notable influx of positive energy.  Smiling also provided a tremendous improvement in communication skills.  Making the effort to smile has made me more comfortable in my own skin.

      Do you know someone at work or in your neighborhood whose expression rarely changes?  Don’t be too quick to judge these people.  They may feel joy on the inside and do not realize they’re communicating gloom and doom on the outside.  A stock line of the comedy club comic is “Sir, are you having a good time?  …. Then why don’t you tell your face about it!”

     Smiling is a gift from my husband and I am incredibly grateful for his lessons. I no longer envy the natural smilers and their inherited gift. I believe smiling is a genetic blessing and it also can be a learned behavior. How wonderful we can learn to smile as easily as those who are gifted! It is a positive way to live and grow.

     Look in the mirror.  If you’re happy on the inside but you see no smile on the outside, you might want to tell your face about it!